Insight

Why is Jeff Bezos bald?

17th Jun, 07:20


This is one of the most common comments we get on our Facebook ads for our hair loss treatment plans:

"If the richest man in the world can't grow his hair back then nobody can."

And it's a very good point. Not because it's true—it's not, and the implied link between money and a "cure" for anything is a tenuous one at best—history is riddled with examples of wealthy people whose fortunes were not improved by the contents of their checking accounts.


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But the question it poses is a good one nonetheless. If Jeff Bezos, the richest man in the world, with a net worth of 152.9 billion US dollars at the time of writing (though this will likely have increased before we publish later today) is bald, then why should Joe Average, with limited financial resources, be able to grow their hair back?

The answer is probably pretty simple.

See, there are two points that are easily missed.

One—the two known effective treatments for hair loss have been around since the late '80s and early '90s. These two things (which we can't legally name here due to Australia's strict advertising laws) are often prescribed together to launch a two-pronged attack on hair loss, and have efficacy rates in the high 80-per cent margin.

But they only work if you act early; they won't make a bald hair hairy again. Once a hair follicle has packed it in, that's it.

By the time these prescription medications became more mainstream, and the public's awareness of them grew, Bezos was about 30 years old—theres a good chance that his strands had already said bye-bye.

And two...

Maybe Jeff Bezos likes how he looks.

There is, after all, nothing wrong with being bald, and many a bare pate can be a great look (especially when worn with a tailored suit, a baller watch, and let's be honest, a private jet).

There's nothing to suggest that Jeff should desperately want hair. After all, his broad smile and bald scalp are both hugely recognisable parts of his image, and he became a household name long after losing his hair.

In fact, if he rocked up to the boardroom sporting a full Fonzie now, people would think it pretty bloody weird.

Another, final truth to consider is the fact that, while Jeff Bezos in particular might be bald, there is another billionaire who lives very much in the public eye who did go bald, and now boasts a luxuriant head of real hair: Elon Musk.

It's no well-kept secret that the enigmatic (and often controversial) Musk was once ailing in the hair department, and that he opted for the most extreme (and expensive) hair loss treatment: a hair transplant.

20 years later and Elon Musk has a full head of hair again...

Old photos of Elon suggest that he was probably too far gone for a course of oral or topical prescription meds, and new photos show just how impressive a job a crack team of surgeons can do if you have enough cash to front up.

It's also a pretty good indicator of just how far hair transplant surgery has come in recent decades—gone is the "doll's head" look of yesteryear. Hair transplants may be expensive, can be painful, and are an extreme option, but they can also certainly look realistic enough when done well.

Given this, it's probably fair to assume that Jeff Bezos isn't too unhappy with his slick and iconic look. If the man wanted a wig made of unicorn down he could afford it, but instead he confidently steps out daily with a "no hair, don't care" joie de vivre.

Another thing to note is how much of Bezos' success can be attributed to his obsession with function over form, and efficiency as a guiding rule. The idea of regular shampooing? With his schedule? Get outta here.

Not to mention the fact that, now he's jacked, the shaved head only adds to his newly found tough guy image.

In conclusion, why is Jeff Bezos bald? Because, like 70 per cent of men, his hair started to fall out. And like 30 per cent of men, it started when he was relatively young.

Statistically, had he chosen a course of treatment, he would have had a very high chance of keeping his hair. But treatment isn't for everybody, and when you're the richest man in the world, you don't need a hirsute head to be taken seriously.

Besides, what Jeff Bezos does with Jeff Bezos' scalp, is frankly, Jeff Bezos' business.

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